Overindulgence in according priority to partner’s needs & comfort, devoid of open discussion at the cost of own happiness, makes you compromise and letting take advantage of your flexibility.  Stop justifying self by giving clarifications to a stubborn unaccommodating partner who pays no heed. Their ego stops them from taking things in stride leading to conflicts. Introspect/self reflect and re-evaluate the desire to continue with relationship. If you always carry a feeling of uncertainty, it makes you anxious or depressed. Breakup affects the psyche and emotional well being making you feel lost & lonely. Consult a professional together to facilitate open discussion to tackle the simmering issues that result in conflicts. Do not lose faith in self, hold on to your confidence, develop a positive self image and derive emotional gratification in creative activities that help build meaningful, fulfilling and better life.            

Are you completely shattered, facing rejections in your struggle? The key is to think positive and keep working, to go with the flow, your plans that fell apart shall fall in place and life will get back to normal. Do not be afraid of meeting people, escapism is not the solution. Reminisce those good old days when you were full of life. Spend time with family & friends who support you selflessly and relish the true happiness surrounded by your loved ones. 

Child’s self and identity is built upon the way we value them as good or bad, smart or dumb, obedient or rebellious etc. Each child experiences life differently. Some might struggle with acquisition of skills to meet expectations. They struggle with depression, anxiety, trauma, abuse, addiction etc that stigmatizes & robs them of their dignity. Parent’s commitment to do whatever is best for their children so that they are not deprived of simple experiences of life is unquestionable. Validate their hard work via recognition and reward. Empowered by validation one sheds fear of judgment and unleashes limitless energetic self in pursuing his/her strong belief in the dream passionately.

 

Struggling to fight stress due to facing tough challenges to survive & strive, work on your communication & behavior. Expressing your grief via silence shall not help, speak to professional who looks at it from your perspective. The more you explore the more you discover.

 

Listen with humility & openness to acknowledge, respect and respond with love & compassion to partner’s angst. Conversation encourages one, steadfast in resolve to find amicable solution to existing mistrust, to come out and express truthfully his/her dilemma.  The adamancy on anyone’s part results in loss of sympathy and thus limits the choice to compromise.

 

Efforts to imbibe partner’s hobbies & interests in life to cement relationship bond prove frustrating with a non committal partner. The struggle & suffering of an individual when treated insensitively makes him/her feel sensitive and act irritable or defensive. Professional help listens attentively, patiently & non-judgmentally, is reassuring and does not give unsolicited advice. One must never ever loose sight of own passion in any situation.

 

Grappling with depression, anxiety, irritability, anger, intolerance and frustration. Lack of social support system i.e absence of friends & relatives in whom one can confide without inhibition, loneliness, uncertainty & fear of the unknown, adverse childhood experience e.g, physical, emotional or sexual abuse are some of the reasons for the situation. Devise own strategy/cope mechanism with professional help rather than suffering in silence.      

 

The restrictions & confinement tests the elasticity of human ties. The fear and anxiety due to loss of independence and privacy on account of unwarranted surveillance results in trespassing in each other’s personal space and gives rise to conflicts. The human traits e.g, apprehensiveness and tendency to feel low makes an individual vulnerable to lose one’s composure and affects the human mind. The lack of interaction leads to decline in communicative and expressing skills. The frustration & suffocation experienced on account of preaching and judgments rather than listening by the other results in irritability, mood swings, rebellion & argumentativeness. Listen, do not impose your thinking, let one commit mistakes and learn from them.        

Understanding Attachment The confusion between love & attachment has entered into all our relationships in a number of ways. To our conditioned minds it appears to be a contradiction (error), but it is a basic spiritual truth - to be loving it is necessary to be detached. Attachment is the root of fear and fear & love cannot exist together just as day & night, winter & summer cannot. The idea & the practice of detachment are found in almost all the paths of wisdom, over the centuries. This is so because attachment is one of the deepest habits that we learn to develop & we do not realize that anything we attach ourselves to turns into a trap for our consciousness, for the self, the being. We know we are attached when we begin to think about someone or something when they are not present & there is no need to think about them. Our mental energy exhausts itself & we have the sensation that we lack control over our thoughts & feelings. Each time that we automatically cling (hold on) to something, we invoke (call for or attract) the presence of fear - whether it be of people, position, power, money or even opinion, any form of attachment means that we will fear harm or loss. Fear takes on many faces (worry, anxiety & tension); it prevents our spiritual growth & frightens us away from or blocks us from love.

 

Understanding Attachment The confusion between love & attachment has entered into all our relationships in a number of ways. To our conditioned minds it appears to be a contradiction (error), but it is a basic spiritual truth - to be loving it is necessary to be detached. Attachment is the root of fear and fear & love cannot exist together just as day & night, winter & summer cannot. The idea & the practice of detachment are found in almost all the paths of wisdom, over the centuries. This is so because attachment is one of the deepest habits that we learn to develop & we do not realize that anything we attach ourselves to turns into a trap for our consciousness, for the self, the being. We know we are attached when we begin to think about someone or something when they are not present & there is no need to think about them. Our mental energy exhausts itself & we have the sensation that we lack control over our thoughts & feelings. Each time that we automatically cling (hold on) to something, we invoke (call for or attract) the presence of fear - whether it be of people, position, power, money or even opinion, any form of attachment means that we will fear harm or loss. Fear takes on many faces (worry, anxiety & tension); it prevents our spiritual growth & frightens us away from or blocks us from love.

 

We all need to be constantly sharpened. This parable may encourage us to know that we are special individuals, with unique talents & abilities. Only a particular individual or person can fulfill the purpose for which he / she was born to accomplish. Therefore, never allow yourself to get discouraged & think that your life is insignificant & that you cannot make any change and, like the pencil, always remember that the most important part of who you are is what’s inside of you & not how you appear to yourself and others on the outside.

 

 

The sense of relatability and connection to each other is affected due to deprivation of love. One’s response must be realist and positive in all interactions. Endeavour must be to forge solid ties that none ever desires to fill the vacuum.    

 Truth & honesty are a must trait to keep bitterness & mistrust at bay in a relationship. Confronting partner calmly duly maintaining composure while discussing an incident affecting communication & creating rift in trust facilitates him/her express own views & perspective without loosing cool and getting into defensive mood leading to arguments. Positive interaction without looking for validation rather than being judgmental & acute loneliness motivates a person to repair what is lacking. Ego does not take a person anywhere it only destroys the sense of gratitude & happiness.       

 

In an Endeavour seeking independent space to craft own life the child seeks to distance self from parents. Parents grilling about personal plan for life, friends, routine habits create inter-generational tension because of different set of ideas about freedom to voice own opinion & widen horizon. Parents intrusion into child’s mental space at times proves challenging. Adapt & adjust, things need to change with grown up child. The turmoil associated with distressing situation generates feeling of apprehension, nervousness within, fear and anxiety. It puts one at unease and lowers one’s self confidence, mandatory to handle calmly the rapidly changing circumstances beyond control.

 

Awarding self for each and every achievement, how so ever small, reiterates one’s faith in his/her efforts to chase dreams with passion. Overconfidence hastens the fading away of one’s sense of adventure. Feeling of belongingness and sense of warmth helps one turn inwards to know the limitations and draw inspiration to continue one’s pursuit.

 The unpredictable twists & turns in life make one happy, anxious, angry & sad. The agony associated with the conflicts, haphazard turn of events experienced in the journey to achieve one’s dream steals the smile on face and warmth in the heart. A dialogue with a Counselor, a trusted friend who listens & understands your psychic stress, helps you learn & unlearn, regain confidence and evolve.   

 Every moment is a fresh beginning. Failure can put down an immensely creative person but cannot break one who is fearless in making choices that may prove to be bad because no one can predict success or failure. Never loose heart.

 

Partner gets upset frequently & sulks endlessly without telling reason it is a negative behavioural trait that hurts and takes a toll on mental health. An individual’s conflicting thoughts do not let one know exactly what one is looking for and results in unpredictable mood swings. In order to safeguard self from feeling responsible for other’s emotional immaturity and carry guilt of ending relationship, you need to talk, give a genuine try and explain self clearly before making a choice.     

Frequently checking messages and updates on social media you are obsessed with your smart phone. You are reconnecting with old and making new friends but it is no substitute for real interaction in person. The overindulgence rather than moderate use is at the cost of meaningful activities that are relaxing and brings in peace.    

 

One starts questioning own credibility and is engulfed by self depreciating emotions because of loss of an opportunity for which he/she worked hard whole heartedly. Be alarmed it is the onset of depression. Talk to self about your strengths as often as you can. Speak to Psychologist & psychotherapist who shall facilitate release and restructure of emotions, deal with internal conflict and advise positive actions to maintain good mental health. 

 

Hope amid despair brings in refreshing qualitative change. The conviction, creative zeal, spirit of rebelliousness, radical experimentation and boundless energy of brilliant young mind that has dreams is bound to succeed.     

 The expectations (disguised desires) generate conflict. Keep expectations little tempered because high expectations often lead to disappointments. Go with the flow in your struggle to grow own roots. Be patient and don’t give up in the face of frequent rejections. The insecurities, uncertainties and vagaries of life develop unfounded fears and frustration which brings in a state of helplessness and restlessness in mind. The impact is so immense it increases the level of anxiety beyond control and adversely affects mental health. The associated mental & emotional pain aggravates to the extent that one looses sense of well-being.

 Networking online forms indefinite global connections and helps to get broader perspective & guidance in shaping one’s attitude, aptitude and interest. Optimal utilization of social media in order to gain an insight for expanding ideas is a must. The abundant knowledge enhances the thought processing capability after getting exposure to a variety of opinions from experts worldwide. But significant over usage of social media is a huge distraction and makes one lethargic, engrosses into boredom & a person tends to lose creativity. It decreases face to face communication skills resulting in lack of confidence to open up about one’s stress & thus resulting in undisclosed feelings.  Ignoring the loved ones present in real life, one gradually breaks bonds instead of strengthening them. This creates barriers for love; belongingness, compassion, and empathy. The lack of emotional connection makes one hyper & the absence of strong relation makes one feel lonely. This leads the way for anxiety, panic and depression. Fewer think they have been authorized with a license to criticize or be hurtful towards others while expressing resentment. Keep your mental stability in check so that no one plays with your thought process via bullying, name-calling, defaming, body shaming, abuse and harassment, which later on might be a cause for disrupting happiness.

 

The emergent need to restore the state of balance on a mental & emotional level, upset due to thoughts of revenge & animosity (hatred), requires us to be aware, careful & detached so that we don’t hurt ourselves. Expressing the negative energy of anger physically as violent behavior attracts violent response and thus disturbs the balance. Letting go of our own tendency of self-importance allows us to win over the feelings of vulnerability & self-doubt.

 

Dreams to touch new horizons makes you stretch & reinvent self, defy norms and learn. The opportunity to choose freedom to be in a relationship with one who cares to listen & trusts helps to live together in harmony. Love, respect and commitment for each other are the prerequisites to nurture and maintain a healthy flourishing relationship for a happy life. The personality, thoughts & beliefs of partner determines state of mind. Do not try to control, you will generate detachment & disconnect that makes partner step outside resulting in disappointment & frustration. Frustration is a form of fear or anger that makes lose control & dictates one’s response. Express and not suppress intense emotions in an inspiring rather than irritating & intimidating way to navigate through confrontationist situation. Shield self from negativity to retain sanity and positivity while grappling with unforeseen situations. The mind dominated by chaos, confusion, fear & hatred, a kind of negative thinking, makes one hurt partner’s esteem involuntarily inviting equally negative response that leads to developing brittle & toxic relationship over the time.

 

Love and not fear brings peace of mind. Understand and recognize true self to live without confusion that is the cause of sufferings. Our upbringing and education does not teach us who and what we really are but what we want. The ‘want’ generates endless desires forcing egocentric actions resulting in sarcastic behavior and thus experiencing pain of facing boycott. Voluntarily overcoming the inability to resist one’s egocentric actions facilitates alteration in life practices. Life lived without attachment inspires to act with love & compassion nurturing relatedness, a recipe for one’s well being.

 A counselor is a loving & compassionate person who listens patiently without feeling exhausted even when you keep talking on & on listing your woes in life.  Put in sincere efforts to make correction to your own consciousness to let go the hidden hurt inside for ultimate betterment. Nature of self, the source of tears, does not change in spite of crying out of self-pity about all the pain caused due to experiencing the negativity. Concede to the facts that shadow the truth about thy true self. You believe you know all to be a "winner" in life despite running into conflicts regardless of whom you meet and then say sorry for bad behavior just not to be bothered anymore by those whom you troubled by unpleasant manifestations. You resent your inability to say "No" but blame others for their selfishness subjecting them to hurt & pain by character fault you have mastered to hide. Admit and concede to the facts that you have built an imaginary value in life that holds up as long as others do not disturb your dreams. You seek the company of flatterers and avoid those whose genuine opinion you think will inconvenience you. The conversation ends with you feeling relaxed, inspired & happy.

 

In the pursuit of success & happiness; the human mind, knowingly or unknowingly, is always pre-occupied with racing thoughts because of the societal pressures. Consciously or unconsciously one continues living with this behaviour that is bound to create stress. Examine your thoughts, introspect, decipher strengths & weaknesses, prioritise & stop futile activities. Whatever one gets in surroundings is own creation in the inner state of mind. Past, present, future everything is connected. The past prevents growth and future remains future only. It is the present that matters. Every step must be taken to accomplish the ultimate purpose of our existence i.e true happiness. Consciously seek love, peace & happiness in life. We cannot change people, places or things surrounding us, but we can change ourselves. It takes great effort to change but by taking responsibility for what is in our life, we can change it in a way we like.  Accept everyone & focus on higher state of consciousness, the negative traits will never bother us. Give a break to busy schedule, spend time with loved ones and pursue passion to heal & revitalise self in order to feel the bliss on way to an intrinsic level of joy.  It inspires us from within to enrich self with emotional freedom for self growth. The accomplishment of intended purpose with patience and persistence is rewarding and inspirational.

 

Never at fault, an image cultivated over time, generally holds back the person from admitting own mistakes in a conflicting situation. Instead the person indulges in blame game and starts blaming others. One cannot change people, places or circumstances around but can change self. Accept and take responsibility for the situation you are in and patiently make persistent efforts to alter it the way it shall not bother to have true happiness.

 

Self confidence defines the way an individual takes care of stress, sadness, anxiety, fear, depression & insomnia in a situation beyond control. Nothing happens without a purpose. Our willingness to recognize the mistakes, staying open to a wide range of possibilities & to embrace circumstances helps us take care for our needs. The trust in the significance of lessons of certain experiences helps us choose wisely at each crossroad.  Nurture your dreams without trying to micromanage every detail along the way. The guidance & faith in self propels the progress of personal evolution and makes it a journey of great joy.

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Conflicts in intimate relationships reveal themselves slowly, give time. Let yourself be judged without feeling guilty. Listening helps to accept & acknowledge your flaws and flexibility to bend so that you don’t break. Unlearn for self improvement, experiment with being varied selves. Rejection or failure, reward self replenishment and restart.

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Generally a person does not share disturbing thoughts with anyone because of the fear of being judged. One needs to understand that handling stress by keeping things to self and bottling up is very dangerous.  In such a case the person must seek help and talk to a counselor.  

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 A person’s interests, aspirations and motivation are inextricably linked to the identity one acquires in society. Sometimes one voluntarily opts to adopt certain behavior and attitudes in order to conform to society and gain its acceptance. A person having a feeling of belongingness and hope has everything in life. Protect your identity, act smart & be careful of people who are prejudiced and influence your relations

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Life is unfair, a thought deeply populated in mind because of perceived injustice done makes a person bitter towards life. It stresses the person significantly, causes disruption in daily life and makes the journey difficult & tiring just balancing despair and hope. Individual suffers and struggles with the feeling of hatred, abandonment and loneliness. Avoid getting upset & discouraged by the ill-treatment & harm. One must appreciate that people with positive mindset, optimistic and constructive approach to life are the most sought after and loved one’s.  A life lived free of prejudice taking the pain in stride helps retain a good and sturdy mental health.      

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The most exciting phase in life is when one steps out of the comfort zone to achieve one’s dream. Be patient and don’t give up in the face of frequent rejections. Not getting bored with what one is excited about keeps a person interested and engaged. Self awareness of one’s strengths and weaknesses helps one rise above feelings, fear and frustration. Affirmative thoughts help to maintain a balanced approach to sufferings, face upheavals calmly and remain motivated to work enthusiastically in order to live a life of contentment & inner peace. 

 

There is always something in one’s mind, the clutter of recurrent thoughts create anxiety which disturbs inner peace, a state of mental calm and serenity. We interact with a variety of people in life. The influence of interpersonal interactions is either greater joy or hurt. Assigning blame to someone or something responsible, to ease the pain, erodes peace of mind causing great turmoil in life. Learn to be free from anxiety.  It is difficult to successfully divest self of resentful feelings but letting go the hurt shall help move on with life. Shift attention from those we resent, surround self with loving & kind people who nurture & encourage in order to clear away the negative energy that exists around and empower self to infuse & enrich life with understanding and love. A supportive environment shall bring freedom from the suffering. 

 

 Silence and tolerance of familial wrongs turn into hatred with the passage of time.  Never ever yield to something in desperation which later on is going to sit heavy on your conscience and force you into a trail of thoughts robbing you of peace and serenity of mind.  Stick to your values because that is what you are; rather than adapting to something to seek validation or approval of your critics. Doing your way what you are passionate about liberates you of the stress generated by others expectations. Feel grateful for being blessed with learning from life’s experience of facing disapproval, insult and hurt by unkind, narrow minded wrongdoer.  

 The incidents and the experiences impact our lives and build a perception & identity of our own.  Imperfection and impermanence is inherent to being human. Learn from them and take life less seriously. Fear makes us doubt our capabilities thus erode our self confidence and sense of self worth. Embrace your imperfections; no one is judging whether or not you are perfect. Life changes more than it stays the same and nothing lasts for long. Aspire and strive to be best but do not conduct yourself in line with someone else’s expectations. Human mind is deeply influenced by thoughts.  Control self talk that is self critical, remain optimistic and change your mind set towards a new perspective of life to win over the frustration & unhappiness.

 Life is beautiful and simple. People slip away from our lives like sand. Conditioned by the surroundings a person acquires a behavior one finds awkward. We form an opinion and start nagging too much preaching life’s lessons repeatedly. An inner sense of rebellion at being compelled to change the behavior, you are passionate about, quietly builds up suppressed feelings leading to pent up anger and aggression to express defiance & annoyance when feel humiliated. Silence & suppression of thoughts lead to anxiety, sadness & depression. Control repetitive & compulsive reaction, learn to ignore minor irritants and listen quietly to what other person tells, who may be lonely inside and struggling all alone. Expression of one’s conviction without being disrespectful & abusive avoids interpersonal conflicts. Acceptance of one’s emotional state, limitations & remaining non-judgmental avoids withdrawal. Don’t counter the rude behavior in the same spirit instead leave and take time out. Realization afterwards works better.  

 

Finding self in a situation that gives birth to anxiety and worry sometimes an individual instinctively overreacts. This aspect of personality is damaging for relationship and invites unwarranted outcome which proves to be painful & traumatic. Turning down an unreasonable excessive demand/expectation with a polite clear refusal smilingly rather than bluntly, interpreted as emotional reaction, helps calm one’s agitated mind to deal with the racing thoughts that elicit immediate distraction. Any activity/hobby like cycling, game, reading, painting, walk etc which is carried out with concentration and focus for about a minimum of 60 minutes provides distraction from the emotional and physical stress and calms down mind & body.

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The kind of thoughts you harbor, in fact, significantly affects your daily relationships with others. If you step into a social gathering, fuming with hate or bitter with cynicism, you drive others away from you. If you step into it bursting with affection for all & bubbling with optimism, you draw others to you. If you notice someone of the opposite sex with disinterest, that person will withdraw his/her own interest in you, if he/she has any. In fact, he/she might even turn disdainful of you. If you show keen interest, however, the person will be flattered & rendered vulnerable to your advances. Everybody enjoys being admired, regardless of whom the admirer is. If you face a person in business & harbor a sympathetic frame of mind towards the person, he/she will instantly “feel” that there is a common bond, & this will hasten &multiply your success with the person. If you face a subordinate & think kindly of him, he will instantly feel that he should strain to please you or show off his ability to you.

 

 

Living and interacting with positive people enriches one’s life with understanding, love and growth infusing happiness and joy. The uncertainties, unpleasant emotional experiences, other’s prejudices, fear of rejections & stigmas affects an individual’s self esteem leading to isolation. The alienation causes stress and adversely affects mental health. The interpersonal interactions sharing concerns with loving & kind people are encouraging and empowering for a personal transformation. Infuse your life with greater joy by confiding in people who listen to you in a non biased manner with care & respect maintaining your privacy.

 

Holding on to the hurt caused by an action/activity, called resentment, erodes peace of mind and is an impediment in personal growth & Joy. Assigning blame relentlessly to someone or something responsible for the pain inflicted does not let one find an outlet to the anger which causes great turmoil in life. It is difficult to successfully divest self of resentful feelings but choosing to let it go voluntarily helps in easing the feeling of pain & suffering. Make an effort to shift your attention from those you resent back toward self to move on with lives.

 

The provocations and inner conflicts lead to anger. One imbibes hatred for others while witnessing violent behavior. One needs to understand that behavioral differences develop solely due to one’s life experiences and respecting others opinion helps one refrain from getting into arguments that destroy inner peace. Learn to rise above the differences, learn from mistakes in the past & focus on self growth, enhance tolerance levels and be kind to each other.

 

Feeling scared in the challenging & complicated times while questioning where current events are headed, how bad is it going to get & how it will affect you. You are caught up in nervousness thinking something bad will happen, which you perpetuate through your traumatic imagination. There is nothing wrong with being afraid as long as we do not let it stop us from doing the things that excite. Frame your thoughts a little differently to shift your mental state from one of resistance to one of openness effecting energy shift from fear, which paralyzes, to excitement. It shall empower you to direct all the energy towards moving forward, growing & learning. Refuse to struggle against it by putting on a false bravado & insisting you're not nervous at all. Instead move forward past the fear without paying any attention, as though it doesn't exist, to the negative state at all. Trust and assure self in your ability to handle challenges. Excitement, curiosity, passion rather than anxiety shall help and inspire you to be more comfortable with fear.

The repercussion of repeated unwarranted aggressive behavior of a child is highly damaging. The instant gratification and a pseudo sense of superiority, authority & pride leaves ever lasting impact on the mind of child. This disgraceful act of foolishness and whimsical thinking needs to be nipped in bud before it develops into an attachment to one's false image of dominance, the negative energy of fear sometimes turning violent seeking attention & respect from others. There is no harm in confronting the child then and there making him/her understand as to what is wrong with ill treatment of peers.